Leaving a legacy

Mike Savage spends a lot of time around death. Most days he goes to a funeral, sometimes two or three. On others he talks with grieving families and dying people. Even when he’s socialising, people will sometimes say they need to come and see him to prepare their funeral.

Mike works at Legacy Funerals in Tauranga, where he has been a funeral director for 24 years. He describes it as a mixture of event management and chaplaincy. While it seems a hard job, Mike says it’s one God’s called him to.

Being a funeral director was not something Mike ever planned to do. That was until a friend from The Salvation Army Tauranga Corps, who worked at a funeral home, heard the company Mike was working for was closing down. He suggested to his boss that they offer Mike a job.

‘He rang my wife and said, “How do you think Mike would handle the funeral business?” She said, “He wouldn’t have a problem.” So they called me.’ That night Mike found himself doing a walk through a funeral home and was signed up with a pager and a phone to start work.

His first job (19 May 1991—the date sticks in his mind) was to transport a body to the funeral home. As he walked in, someone called his name. It turned out that the deceased man’s brother was a former work colleague and Mike was able to spend time comforting the family. That’s when Mike says he knew this was a call from God. And it has turned out to be just that.

At first, the job was hard, especially visiting the dying, learning how to talk to them and knowing it may be the last time you do. But you get used to it, Mike says, adding that he’s developed a better use of words for such times.

Helping families with children who have died is particularly tough.

‘I’ve broken down a lot and shared tears with families when looking after their child or grandchild. I’ve always believed, even though I’m qualified as a funeral director, people will never ask, “What are your qualifications?”, but they will read your heart. If they see you care and want to minister to them, that’s what matters. Showing empathy and compassion is vital.’

Some requests can be difficult, like the lady who asked not to have a funeral.

‘She said, “I want to be picked up from where I die, from there straight to the crematorium. There will be no service for me. I know some people will be upset, but that’s how it will be for me.” ’

A privileged task

However, the job is also a privilege, meeting special people and caring for them. Mike says he’s had a lot of support, particularly from his wife Dorothy, daughters Erana and Taina, his Salvation Army church and, of course, the arms and grace of God.

It’s not all sad, either. Laughing with people is also important, including chatting and joking before the ceremony and laughing at funny moments during it. There can even be humour when the worst happens, as it did at one funeral.

‘We had two people with the same initials. I was already at a funeral, so I phoned the funeral home and said, “Can you prepare this person?” I got to the hall, started handing out the service sheets, and a woman came up to me and said, “I think you’ve got the wrong name plate.”

‘I went to look and said, “We’ve got the wrong casket!” I spoke to the deceased’s grandson and said, “We haven’t got Grandad!” [The grandson] came with me and we went racing back to the funeral home, got the deceased and raced back, just in time. I went to see the family, thinking they’d be distraught, and they were in hysterics. They said, “Grandad loved to play practical jokes on people, so it’s like this is a practical joke on him.”’

Faith and values

When it comes to the business side, Mike says he’s fortunate to work for a company that reflects his faith and values. All Legacy Funerals profits go back into the community through the Legacy Funerals Trust, helping people have an ongoing positive impact, Mike says.  

When a family settles the account, and bills and wages have been paid, the profit goes to the trust and community groups apply for funds, Mike explains. People can also set up a Prepaid Funeral Fund with Legacy, putting money toward the cost of their funeral into a fund, where the interest goes to the trust.

The trust got its start after the Boxing Day Tsunami in 2002, when Tauranga funeral director Gregory Brownless travelled overseas to help repatriate bodies to their home countries.

‘He decided what he would like to do with his business was to give back to the community, so he sold the business to the community for one dollar,’ Mike says. Legacy Funerals and the Legacy Trust were launched on 1 October 2007.

The trust’s main beneficiary is Waipuna Hospice. Grants also go to schools, Kōhanga Reo, sports clubs, Riding for the Disabled, Surf Lifesaving and many others. It has given back $1.4 million in grants since 2007.

It also organises two memorial days a year at a Tauranga park, gifting families a native tree to plant in memory of their loved one.

Pre-planning funerals

Mike, who has been a trust director since 2007, says giving out grants tugs on the heart strings, but it also helps him fulfil another important role—encouraging people to plan ahead for their funeral. Although it may seem a bit morbid, planning is important. Mike tells every family before a funeral, ‘If you prepare well and I prepare well, we will have a good service.’

He often meets with people to help them pre-plan their funeral through a ‘pre-arrangement’, where notes are taken and copies kept by an executor and at the funeral home.

While some leave it late to plan, others get ready early. Mike tells the story of a friend he was chatting to one day recently, when they casually dropped into the conversation, ‘We need to come see you sometime.’ His advice, ‘Come whenever you’re ready.’  

He’s seen both sides of the process, as well. ‘My wife and I have pre-arranged our funeral service. In fact, our daughter Taina, who is one of our funeral staff, sat down with us one day and we went through our funeral arrangements.’

At a time of high stress, a pre-arrangement gives the family peace of mind, Mike says.

‘For those family members who are left, it’s a whole lot easier. The family can say, “This is what Mum or Dad asked for.” Sometimes when we’re in discussion I hear people saying, “Mum said she wanted to be buried”, and another will say, “No, she told us cremation”. [A pre-arrangement] takes that stress out of it.’

Individuality and creativity

When it comes to arranging a funeral, the key is to reflect the individuality of each person and how they were created—and delivering on that is important. ‘If it’s too outrageous, we may need to change it a little, but we try to make sure what they want is what they get.’

One area that’s becoming more varied is the venue, with outdoor funerals, especially in people’s gardens, becoming more popular.

‘I did an interent of ashes on Mount Maunganui Beach, planted a pohutakawa and buried the ashes around it,’ Mike says. ‘Community halls, people’s homes, up on the farm—once upon a time, funeral services were conducted mainly in churches, but the only people that have funerals in churches these days are Christians and people that want big venues.’

In and around the casket is a place where people also like to get creative, Mike says. Some people want to make their own casket, and he’s had all sorts of sizes and shapes.

He encourages people to put things around the casket that people will instantly recognise and associate with the person. Anything from gumboots to cricket bats get used. If families want, Mike also invites them to write or draw on the inside of the casket lid, or on pieces of paper that can be put inside. Families choose how the body is dressed, and then there’s the huge variety of things people like to put in caskets—although there are some rules on what can go in, especially if a body is being cremated.

‘For children, people will put in soft toys. Some people like to put in golf balls or a cell phone, rugby jerseys, trophies or memorabilia they have gathered over the years. There are people who put bottles of their loved one’s favourite drink in the casket.’

Another area of creativity is in the music people want played. Although hymns still get used, Mike says he’s heard everything from ‘Jeremiah Was a Bullfrog (Joy to the World)’ to ‘Bohemian Rhapsody’.

‘Some of the [music choices] I struggle with are heavy metal, Metallica, those kinds of songs. That’s not my type of music, but everybody’s tastes are different. We have a God who created us differently—he loves diversity and within this ministry I need to be accepting.’

Faith at work

When it comes to his own faith, Mike says he has never had to hide it. At times of grief or death, many people consider spiritual things and God often makes a way for Mike to talk to people.

‘I believe that I was created to be a minister and servant for God, and being a funeral director has certainly expanded my territory and allowed me to grow wings. God has opened up a very big field for me. I call it a parish that he’s given me to minister to people. The opportunities are just huge. In the time I have been in this, I have led three people to the Lord on their death bed and people have attended our church because God has sown a seed in their lives.’

While his faith is vital to his work and he prays with his staff each day, when it comes to clients Mike doesn’t set out to preach to them. Instead, he tries to let God’s Spirit work through him and to be careful in the way he conducts himself and answers people. Mike says his aim is to practice Francis of Assisi’s famous quote to ‘preach the gospel at all times and, if necessary, use words’.

‘When I am about to knock on someone’s door—not knowing who I am going to meet and what

 their physical, mental, emotional and spiritual state may be—I say, “God, lead me and guide me and bless them.” When you walk into a house, spirit calls to spirit and people recognise there’s something different about you. I remember once I went into a house and I walked past this woman and she said, “Oh! You’re spiritual aren’t you?” before I’d even opened my mouth.’

After 24 years, Mike says he has found his calling and has no plans to give it up any time soon.

‘There have been moments when I thought, “Why am I doing this?”—when you get woken at early hours of the morning—but I recognise God’s call to do this. And unless he picks me up and takes me somewhere else, this is where I am!’

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by Robin Raymond (c) 'War Cry' magazine, 22 August 2015, pp6-7.
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